It’s even worse when you know nothing about weddings. “Who is this Pnina and how is she still employed?”
TLC
1. How do I always get suckered into watching this show on Friday nights?
2. I can tell if we're in New York or Atlanta mostly by whether it's Randy or Fake Southern Randy.
3. Judging by the morning staff meetings, this place will only see brides on a given day if they fit into that day's easily digestible category, like "brides who brought their fathers" or "brides who want a weird-colored dress" or "brides with horribly judgmental friends who probably shouldn't be there."
4. Who are all these other staff members? They're at the morning meeting, then they disappear. Where do they go after this? Are they magical, ephemeral dress fairies? That would actually explain a lot.
5. Theme song time!
♪"Tryin' on lots of really poofy dresses that are♫
♫Way too pricey♪
♪This costs as much as a car"♫
6. I wonder if this bride is going to talk about how she's so happy because she's marrying her best friend?
7. Yep, she did.
8. I'm beginning to think this show has a tragic backstory quota that they have to meet each episode.
9. Do people actually get married at age 19? You can't even legally drink yet. Slow down, children.
10. There's always one bride who lost like 50 pounds, which is really impressive to me since I can't even lose this stuffed crust pizza I'm eating.
11. Note to self: "assets" is code.
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12. People like getting married in barns.
13. I can also tell if we're in New York or Atlanta based on how much it looks like the fiancé in the photos looks like he might enjoy Monster Energy Drink.
14. The first dress is never the one. They should save time and just skip to the second dress.
15. People keep talking about all the different dress styles but all I see are ball gowns and not-ball gowns.
16. Scratch that. There are also see-through dresses.
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